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The following article appeared in the January 25, 2007 issue of The Journal of Business.
Helping Suddenly Single Boomers Resume Their Social Lives
Seasoned & Single offers dating-service alternative to people
mostly over 55
Seasoned and Single, Inc. a business owned by a Spokane man and a Coeur d'Alene woman, aims to help the suddenly single, middle-aged baby boomer get a social life.
The business runs a club that's intended as an alternative to the dating scene, say founders Roy Mitchell, of Spokane, and Kathleen Lamanna of Coeur d'Alene.
"It's not a dating service, and we don't want it to be that," says Mitchell, who also is a Spokane optician. "We try to make sure that's clear with everybody. For most, that's a relief."
Lamanna, a relationship coach and federal court worker, says Seasoned & Single is for people looking for a social setting where they can meet other people - especially of the opposite sex - their own age.
While the club is aimed at singles aged 45 and older, most members are 55 and up. "The majority of members have been in long-term relationships," Lamanna says. "We act as a bridge between the life they had and getting back into the single social world."
She says people have a tendency to turn inward when a long-term relationship ends through a breakup or a death of the partner.
Seasoned & Single, she says, provides coping tools through seminars, social gatherings and sharing experiences in "safe settings."
"After you've been married 20+ years, it's a whole different ball game to get to the point of being socially active," Lamanna says.
One of the first steps recommended for newly single boomers is to clean up the past, she says. "It's very important to be clean emotionally," she says. By that, she means a person may need to grieve for a lost spouse, or alleviate anger issues over a breakup before moving on.
Lamanna and Mitchell are business partners, but aren't a couple. Both are single. Mitchell has been married twice. Lamanna is divorced following a 25 year marriage.
"Roy and I can identify with people coming from long-term relationships and having to find a whole new way of being," Lamanna says.
Mitchell and Lamanna became fast friends when they met at a singles activity a few years ago. That's when they also recognized that opportunities for middle-aged singles are limited.
Together, they developed social seminars that they continue to hold through their business. Seminar topics include dating tips, the varying expectations of men and women, and setting boundaries.
"They cover everything from phone calls to sexually transmitted diseases," she says.
Jacqueline Gedeik, a Coeur d'Alene licensed counselor, is part of the seminar team as an independent consultant to Seasoned & Single.
Lamanna and Mitchell often employ humor. "We do skits about relationships that went south," she says.
At some social gatherings, they recommend that participants refrain from talking about their jobs, and past relationships. "We could talk for a half-hour about what we do for a living and we wouldn't find out much about each other," Lamanna says.
Seasoned & Single was incorporated last spring at the recommendation of an accountant. They are still nurturing the business along, but Lamanna says her dream is for Seasoned & Single to become a full-time job.
Mitchell says it's been rewarding for him to help people re-enter the social world. "Financially, as we go farther down the road, it will carry its own weight," he says. Adds Lamanna, "If we weren't having a good time, I don't think we would be doing this. What I love about working together is the balance. We have both male and female perspectives. It works well for us, and we are approachable" for clients.
Membership in Seasoned & Single is $180.00 per year and includes discounts for twice - yearly seminars and social events.
Members also have access to a 24-hour members-only section on the Seasoned & Single Website, including a members' business directory.
While Mitchell and Lamanna ask prospective members not to approach the club with an agenda of finding a mate within its membership, romance does happen sometimes.
Some members who've paired up and are even married have asked to continue to participate in Seasoned & Single activities.
"We let them because they are good friends, and it's a good shot in the arm for everyone," Mitchell says.
"We celebrate it," Lamanna adds.
By Mike McLean, The Journal of Business
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